The ADHD Effect on Marriage: Understand and Rebuild Your Relationship in Six Steps

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One method couples can adopt to support communication and connection is learning conversations. This mirroring exercise facilitates sharing ideas and needs with each other without any suggestion of problem-solving. Rather, it’s about understanding why a particular activity or scenario is difficult or painful. Step 1: Cultivating Empathy for Your Spouse - stories from real life and what they mean for you (p. 79. Audio 4. Kindle loc. 1403) The ADHD brain functions in a very consistent and predictable way. That means that certain behavioral patterns will inevitably arise in the context of a romantic relationship. For instance, a “parent-child” dynamic might develop, in which the partner without ADHD takes over practical responsibilities but then feels resentful. Or they constantly nag their partner, which only creates distance, irritation, and conflict. Learn more about adult ADHD. Learning more about your partner's experience will help you have more empathy and patience. Will help validate and clarify relationship struggles. It will help clarify that you’re not crazy as the none ADHD spouse

The ADHD Effect on Marriage helps couples understand why things never seem to get better, no matter how hard they try - and how to change that, not by "trying harder," but by "trying differently" so they can renew their love and joy. Step 3: Getting Treatment for You Both - what effective treatment looks like in a relationship (p. 145. Audio 6. Kindle loc. 2420)Beth starts by asking Alex if they can have a learning conversation about something that’s bothering her. She then shares in about 100 words what’s weighing on her, like “I often feel hurt by things you blurt out at me.” When she’s finished, Alex then repeats in his own words what he thinks he’s heard, without adding any of his own thoughts. Beth then confirms if he’s heard right. If not, they’ll try again. The first half of the book felt super repetitive: wives, you shouldn't nag your husbands and make sure you exercise and get treatment for your likely depression (and don't try to compensate for your husband or treat him like a child); husbands, make sure you exercise and take your meds and get therapy. But even if your examples are only one type, you can at least create advice for those who are outliers (like me). If you are a nonADHD wife needing help for relationship issues with an ADHD husband I bet this is going to be super helpful for you. Having newly been diagnosed with ADHD myself I have been where some of those couples are. Still - Melissa approach the content mostly from the POV that it's the male who has ADHD and how the female suffers.

Personal boundaries help you find the line between moderating who you are to support a relationship, and compromising yourself to the point that you behave in unhealthy ways. To find that line, you need to know which boundaries are most important to you and which ones have enough flexibility, so that you can bend without breaking. Millions of adults with ADHD struggle to overcome their inattention, procrastination, impulsivity, and distractibility. Yet few realize that after they marry, these same symptoms can severely affect their loved ones, often with disastrous results. Melissa Orlov offers a unique and refreshing approach to helping ADHD couples understand the underlying issues caused by ADHD that can negatively impact their relationship. Her methods are built upon years of experience and offer couples hope and guidance. Most importantly, her strategies prepare them to make smart choices to build happier, healthier futures. This book is long overdue and much needed!" When frustration and tension take root in a relationship, it’s easy to fall out of love with your partner, even if you still love them. You might long for the fun that was part of your early romance, or wish that you felt happy when your partner walked through the door – even if they managed to forget the bread yet again! Create a plan to reach long-term goals for your relationship that aligns with who you are as individuals It may be too late for us. We needed to put to use this type of information and support a very long time ago, and while I have read many current, excellent books on the subject, this one hits home as the best. Hope we can scrape ourselves together for another try.People with ADHD often feel different, ashamed, unlovable, and afraid of failure. Every day, they must navigate through the world with a constantly buzzing mind that prevents them from distinguishing what’s important to focus on and what isn’t a priority. Being relentlessly barraged by so much information is overwhelming, and can easily lead to panic. Trying harder doesn’t create change. If you want to salvage your relationship, you need to do something radically different. The book has left the feeling that people with ADHD should avoid relationships all together and spend life alone. (Based on the first 4 hours of the same message)